Yes, Adonis has dependable service... No, not that type of dependable services you lil' freak nasties!
lol.
All I'm saying is that my husband is the one person I can count on to have my back, no matter what. He treats me like I'm the most important in the world and it makes me feel like nothing else matters.
I once read a book that described the difference between being dependent, independent, and inter-dependent. Ok, I'll try to summarize:
When you are someone who is dependent on someone else to get by in life, it shows you are incapable of progressing on your own.
When you are an independent person, it shows that you are a strong person and can achieve many things on your own. Now, ladies... we always claim to be "independent woman" (queue the Destiny's Child song... Ok, now cut) and claim that "we don't need no man to help us". Well, according to this philosophy, if you think that way then you aren't going to be able to reach your maximum potential.
"Interdependent" is the level after "dependent". By being interdependent on someone else you achieve more than what you could ever do on your own. Let me pause || real quick... You can only be interdependent if you are a independent person. Someone who is dependent can't ever be on this level...
Being interdependent in a relationship, according to this philosophy, does not mean you are dependent on your partner. It means that you two work together. It means you pick up where he leaves off and he fills in your weaknesses so that together, as a unit, you progress and help each other grow and achieve. Listen to what I am saying: You can achieve great things as your own. But, if you have a great partner in your life, you can achieve soooooo much more.
Think about it. Are you going to stop at being an "independent woman" -- or will you take it one step further and be interdependent?? Better yet, is your current partner someone you can be interdependent with??
Side Note: This philosophy isn't only for romantic relationships. It can apply to any relationship (business, personal, etc.).
I don't know why but when I read this I was thinking about T.E.A.M (together everyone achieves more) but anywho I definitely think in a marriage/relationship you want to be interdependent its a nice happy medium and not to mention the healthier of the three. Once one person because to independent in a relationship they start to treat the other as if they don't matter and they can get along fine without and thats usually what ends up happening. And dependent breeds a host of other problems that can really break a relationship down. I am glad that you both work together and support each other!
ReplyDeleteEven though we preach the philosophy, just like anyone else we are constantly exploring what this mean. Constantly tweaking the formula to suit the relationship and the situations that we're in. You have to become chameleon, be flexible, and be willing to evolve. Thats what works for us, and if never tried before, will work for others.
ReplyDeleteI had never heard of that acronym T.E.A.M. before. I think its one of those things that are Idealistic, but completely appropriate once you're on the same page as your family & peers. I like it though. I'll convince Diana to do a "T.E.A.M. Finger-Bokeh" picture we'll see how it turns out....
fyi... im not holding a flashlight or a candle..nor is it one of those "push-in" lights.... can you guess what it was?? nooooo not photoshop either!!
ReplyDeleteI appreciate this post Diana and periodically I get a chance to check you and Adonis's blog (which is the coolest thing I've seen by far). My prince charming hasnt found me yet, but I am all for waiting by turn to get "dependable service"...you are completely right; sometimes even when we are so independent, you always need to be dependent on something/someone else...You two are always in my prayer and commend your teamwork and inspirational messages!! I wish you guys could have been on one of Oprah's last shows or something, because being a team in a relationship, especially marriage, should be on the top of a couple prosperity list!! love u guys, keep being fun!
ReplyDeleteTiani (Jack's Daughter..lol)